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Ok, I know it’s already a week into April but I haven’t posted anything in almost a year. I set up this website because I did a stupid reality TV last year that I thought would make me famous but it didn’t. Good thing that I didn’t quit my day job which has gone quite well since that’s all that’s gotten my focus after that nationally televised disaster. I’m still doing stand-up 3-4 days a week still but it’s nothing more than open mics at sketchy venues that I don’t tell much people about. My business is kicking ass and I’ve fooled the whole grown up world along the way. I’m still keeping the dream alive but it’s hard to believe some nights when I perform in rooms with less than a dozen people in attendance.

Anyways, I recently was approached to handle the social media campaign for a huge multi-national corporation (I already have a few as clients) and after reading my blog, they were horrified and used the fact that I did a reality TV against me. Needless to say, I lost that lead. As much as I’m now a 32 year old slave to money, I still won’t apologize for who I am.

Expect to hear much more from me because I have too much on my mind to not share with you nice folks. Let’s stay in touch!

The City of Miami Commissioners, in particular Commissioner Marc Sarnoff, has told us they will not be renewing
the lease at the Coconut Grove Convention Center where Burn Notice is based.
Commissioner Marc Sarnoff has plans to build a park on the property where the Convention Center is located.
This park is linked to a private condominium that is being built across the street from our site.
He has told the other Miami Commissioners that he “is ready to go” with the demolition process.
The cost to move Burn Notice to another stage and office location will be at least 1 million dollars and
will take the final season of Burn Notice out of the city of Miami and possibly the state of Florida.
This not will not only impact the cast and crew and the 150 jobs it supplies per day, but is sending a message to
the world that Miami is not a friendly film community.
I would like each and every one of us to write to commissioner Sarnoff at – msarnoff@miamigov.com,
and let him know the impact this will place on your business revenue.

South Miami’s Franky Arriola, 31, gets to check out the singles scene in Love in the Wild, airing 9 p.m. on NBC Tuesday. Hosted by Jenny McCarthy, the show tries to hook up bachelors and bachelorettes in the Dominican Republic,Survivor style.

His role: troublemaker, trying to break up happy couples.

Though many viewers may perceive the Christopher Columbus High School grad as a reality villain, it wasn’t a bad way to pass the time. Especially since he got to fulfull a lifelong dream of meeting McCarthy.

“She was fun, she doesn’t age,’’ says Arriola, who dabbles in standup comedy, and can often be seen at the Miami Improv in Coconut Grove joking about the “ambivalent’’ girls on the Miami dating scene. “I remember watching her when she was goddess on [MTV’s] Singled Out.’’


Read more here: http://www.miamiherald.com/2012/06/04/2832547/love-in-the-wild-star-jenny-mccarthy.html#storylink=cpy

Love in the Wild star: Jenny McCarthy is hot – People – MiamiHerald.com.

I love what Miami is becoming.  The nights of crowded lines in South Beach to enter a crowded club to pay for overpriced drinks is over.  A new era in nightlife has been forming the past 3 years.  This Miami Herald article is worth sharing.

The new trend in Miami is a cocktail culture of proper lounges, dive bars and speakeasies. Here the venue size matters less than the quality of your nightlife experience.

Miami’s top lounges and bars | miami.com.

 

Ozzie Guillen is a fucking asshole.  I know at this point, I sound like all of my fellow Cuban Americans here in Miami up in arms about his mancrush on Fidel Castro but my story with Ozzie goes back 21 years.  This story is beyond Castro.  It’s about a grown man/public figure being a total asshole to a 10 year old kid asking for an autograph.
 
Here’s my story:
 
My dad coached/mentored former MLB pitcher Alex Fernandez in his youth and he’s been a close family friend ever since.  Alex is a great guy and when he pitched for the Chicago White Sox, we’d visit him and he’d bring us into the locker room to meet the players.  This is obviously the coolest thing to a 10 year old kid getting the opportunity to meet Bo Jackson, Robin Ventura, Frank Thomas and an aging Carlon Fisk.  Ozzie Guillen was the only guy that was a total prick.  He was an obnoxious loudmouth that didn’t shut up.  It was obvious that the other players didn’t care for him.  Regardless of this fact, I went up to him to ask for an autograph.  He refused and I walked back to Alex disappointed (he later got me one).
 
A few months alter, my family was in NYC to see Alex play against the Yankees.  I’ll never forget that Alex brought me into the dug out of Yankees Stadium to get an insider’s tour of “The House That Babe Built” and to meet the players.  Everybody was so nice EXCEPT for Ozzie Guillen.  Still a major league prick.  He started yelling at me and told Alex he that can’t bring in non-family members.  He looked me in the eye and told me that the locker room wasn’t “fucking Disneyworld” and to get the fuck out of there.  I’ll never forget those words.
 
When I got back to Miami, I went into my closet and I threw my autographed baseball card into the trash.  I couldn’t believe what a world-class asshole could do that to a fan.
 
Fast forward 21 years, he’s coaching my hometown team and spewing his love for Fidel Castro.  It’s amazing that he’s still a low class pig after all this time.
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